Why did you leave me?
Obviously, you weren’t happy with our arrangement. Were you so unhappy that you decided to pack up your suitcase and leave me in the dust? Was I not good enough for you anymore? Didn’t I support you through thick and thin? Through the best of times and the worst of times? Were you tired of the rainy days? Did you want a new place that badly? I understand that we were going through a rough patch but things were getting better! We may not have hit the lottery but I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. It wasn’t because I didn’t love you.
Because I did. I loved you. So much.
But you had eyes for another. It was pretty obvious. I even overheard some of your conversations with your friends…but I didn’t think that it would happen until it finally did on that day that you left. I tried everything I could to prevent you from leaving but all my attempts fell upon deaf ears. I saw it in your eyes and in your actions. Looking at you from a distance now….THAT’S what hurts the most. Seeing you….enjoying your life and realizing your potential….with someone else. You are at the end and you are seeing how exciting life can be. Your future is so promising. Not for me though. I didn’t get promised anything. I’m just standing here where we used to live…kicking the dirt and wondering what could’ve been and if I could’ve done things differently. Even if I meet other people, I’ll appreciate it but I will always end up comparing them to you. It is torture watching someone else enjoy their time with you and knowing that you are playing back memories of the times that we used to have. You don’t understand what it’s like watching you from a distance. There is a void. A void that can never be filled entirely. It’s a chasm that remains and every time I see you taking that next step with someone else, it grows into something bigger…..until it engulfs everything.
That could’ve been me and you. That could’ve been us.