I’ll admit that I’m a bitter Knicks fan for James Dolan letting Jeremy Lin walk.  Without Lin, we’re left with geriatric Jason Kidd and Ray Felton running the point.  While Jason Kidd just got arrested for DUI, check out this recent picture of Ray Felton:

Fat Ray Felton

No, that’s not a random picture of some dude at a pickup game.  That’s actually Ray Felton.  There’s no nice way to say it.  He’s fat.  Dude needs to lose like 30 pounds.  I’ve been crushing twitter with #feltonfatjokes for the past couple of days (hat-tip to @BaggyDizzle for the initial hashtag).  Here’s the best Ray Felton is fat jokes on the internet:

When Ray Felton gets crossed up the commentators say he got his cankles broken #feltonfatjokes #Knicks

Ray Felton turns the ball over less than Lin because his hands are sticky from all the BBQ sauce #feltonfatjokes #Knicks

Felton is so fat, Eddie Murphy asked him to be one of the Klumps in a nutty professor sequel. #feltonfatjokes

Then Eddie Murphy realized that Felton is so fat that it’d be unrealistic #feltonfatjokes

Ray Felton may miss the first 8 weeks of the NBA regular season during filming of The Biggest Loser #feltonfatjokes #knicks

The only time Ray Felton gets a tripple double is when he places his order at the Wendys drive thru #feltonfatjokes #Knicks

Raymond Felton is so fat that Eddy Curry got jealous and said “I need to get my weight up.” #feltonfatjokes

Ray Feltonity is when you make several trips to the buffet at all you can eat #feltonfatjokes #knicks

James Dolan was ready to sign Lin’s offer sheet but Ray Felton ate it. #feltonfatjokes #knicks

Instead of a jersey and shorts the Knicks are giving Ray Felton a blue mumu with his number on it. #feltonfatjokes #knicks

Ray Felton’s gatorade cups are filled with orange soda #feltonfatjokes #Knicks

Ray Felton takes home doggie bags from all you can eat buffets #feltonfatjokes

Ray Felton is on the see food diet. If he sees food, he eats it #feltonfatjokes

Ray Felton is so fat, the biggest loser got canceled because weight is one thing that Felton can never lose #feltonfatjokes

Ray Felton signed his #Knicks contract in maple syrup #feltonfatjokes

@HookTSB Felton watched the beginning of breaking bad and gained 10 more pounds just from thinking about bacon #feltonfatjokes

Raymond Felton is so fat that weight watchers was all like “Hey, we aren’t miracle worker!” #feltonfatjokes

Follow @BaggyDizzle and @HookTSB on Twitter


  • Chris Ross

    I can’t believe Felton is an upgrade over Lin. Felton struggled after leaving D’Antoni’s system for the past 2 years. Now people expect that he can come back to run a brand new Mike Woodson offense and mesh really well with Carmelo Anthony? I don’t think so. Also, could you please take a look at my blog cuz I really wanna know what you think http://chrisross91.wordpress.com/2012/07/18/no-lin-situation/

    • HookTSB

      Thanks for reading Chris. I checked out your Lin article. While we definitely went overboard with the Lin puns during the whole Linsanity faze, I think they end with his departure from the big apple. I like your writing style though, if you’d like to join us and become a contributing writer to TSB please contact us at totalsportsblog@yahoo.com

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